Do the right thing - ALWAYS!!

I am starting to write this post with mixed feelings of shame, a necessity to shed my load and a compelling intention to educate others from my experience. I am going to narrate an incident which happened yesterday night which left me very guilty and ashamed, but quickly reversed to open my eyes to something which I have believed in strongly for a long time. I must say that by the time I decided to write about this incident in my blog, the feeling had almost become one of enlightenment.

I am going to let you take a peek into what happened without much ado. But, beware!!! For those of you who know me quite well this might be quite a shock. Nevertheless, it is one of those experiences in my life that turned into a very good lesson.

Ganesh an I had been pretty much excited about Pumpkin(our new man in the family – a lab pup) and I had been busy messaging my kith and kin about his homecoming. We had gotten out of the house to do some shopping and I was carrying a plastic cover with some of Chickoo’s refuse (he had vomitedL). I was also busy messaging as I got out with the cover and had intended to dump it outside our gate from where the Corporation guys would clear it off the next day morning. This was the usual practice. However, since I was so engrossed in the messaging, I forgot to do this and I carried it to the car and got into the car as Ganesh was reversing. I then almost immediately realized I had forgotten to dump the cover and got out and started looking for the dustbin with the car door ajar. Ganesh was also talking over the phone (speaker mode!!! That is info for all of you who are like me who hate people who drive with their mobile tucked between their ear and shoulder) and as the door was ajar and he was in the midst of reversing he started shouting and I, with my thoughts occupied by all the messaging, just dumped the cover outside the gate of the house where I was standing and got into the car. Yeah, yeah, that is the most stupid act I ever did guys!! I know all of you who know me are gaping at this with mouth wide open. I really can’t explain why I acted like that though I almost immediately realized what a stupid thing I had done as soon as I got into the car. So, I decided that the minute Ganesh reverses and stops I would get out of the car and pick up the cover and drop it in the dust bin on my way.

Hold on guys!!! The story is not yet over. The worst part is just round the corner. Even before the car stopped, I saw an old gentleman who had been right behind us in his car, had got out and started shouting at me!!! It was apparently the owner of the house and he was waiting to open the gate to his house and get in. Now, should I say, how annoyed he would have been? I got out the minute Ganesh stopped and ran out and apologized to him and picked up the cover and got into the car. I was so ashamed that I could have killed myself. It was the most demeaning moment of my life to have been caught by someone, trying to dump waste in front of their house. Especially, for a person like me who always drops waste into a dustbin, even if it is a bus ticket or a small bill. I have always praised myself on being clean and tidy and fulfilling my duty as a citizen of India. And lo!!! Here I go!!! All the pride and respect I had going down the drain in a minute.

Needless to say, I was very upset and guilty and cribbed for the next ten minutes to Ganesh on why I had acted so stupid and how bad I felt. He was also flabbergasted and made no bones about how he didn’t expect such an act from me. After the ten minutes of bad feeling, I fell silent and started thinking and analyzing what led to this deed. I gathered that it was mainly due to the fact that I was very pre-occupied with my messaging (which obviously could have been put off for a while) and I had also for a moment thought it was alright to fall short of being righteous just once. However, I couldn’t digest it even for a minute after the deed. Now that taught me two lessons!

One, not to be too preoccupied with trivial pleasures that your common sense is blinded to the brink of stupidity. Two, never to think that you can make an excuse (even if it is just once) to fall short of doing the right thing.

I have always told myself time and again when I am tempted to fall short of perfection that if one decides to follow the path of righteousness, one should stick to it, however difficult the circumstances are. However tough it is to do a job, I have believed that if I can’t do it right (and this has nothing to do with success, mind you!), I don’t attempt to do it at all. I have read a few articles and books which have said how perfectionists become stressful personalities and that it is alright once in a while to relax and try not concentrate on trivial things. I have for some reason never felt comfortable with that thought, though I agree that it is not worth stressing yourself with what is really not important. But, I have tried not to take this thought to heart and practice it sincerely because I am scared that if I make it a habit to be less perfect I would just get accustomed to taking all imperfections easily. This, I think would ultimately lead me away from the right path without me even realizing it.

After all that deep thinking and enlightment, I pacified and tried to forgive myself by saying GOD made this incident happen, probably to open my eyes to the truth that ‘you can never get away doing a wrong deed’.

Musical revelation

At last, I found time to add a new post to my blog (for all those who were eager to read my 'mazed mind'!).

After last time's peep into to my 'Animal Instincts', this time a little something about my less explored creative side. I must confess I am not a great listener of music, meaning, in the last couple of years music has been very less a part of my life. Infact the only music I have been listening to is the one on 98.3 FM Radio Mirchi during my drive to office. Looks like in the months to come this would also be a rarity, as I have to now ride to office in my Scooty (like olden days), due to my job switch (now that may not be news to anyone who knows me well, but for others, yes, it is a little change that has happened in the past week). As usual, I am weaning away from the topic I guess. Coming back to what I started to say, I got this great opportunity to attend a music concert a week ago at Music Academy which really awakened my senses and made me relax thoroughly, which I never thought I could do.

I took tickets for this concert from my good friend Lakshmi, mainly because it was an event being conducted for raising funds for a great cause (about which I will tell you a little later). This was a fusion concert by the popular Veena maestro Rajhesh Vaidhya (those of you who don't know him, it's worth getting to know him and his music hitherto) and playback singer Karthik (of 'Boyz' fame). I was actually a little apprehensive because I wasn't sure how a veena recital would be and what a playback singer like Karthik would do in this concert. But these two great musicians I must say, created two hours of absolute magic taking each member of the audience to the heights of sheer listening pleasure. This kind of music is really rare to come by and it was a revelation how music could stir our senses. I was so enthralled that I had a good mind to call all my friends and urge them to come to the show from wherever they were.

The music was a mix of western classical, rock, pure classical, some filmi songs and absolutely stunning intrumentals. I am not a great judge of music and don't really know how to explain what I heard. But for those of you who read THE HINDU, the show's review was covered on Friday, the 31st of March on the 'Friday Review' supplement. The show was called 'Temptations' and it was a first of its kind and it was put up by an NGO called Gnyan Prabodh, an 'Education trust with a difference', which is working to help bring about 100% literacy in the country. The cause I must say was another reason why I felt completely satisfied to have been a part of this concert. I felt so stirred by the young minds who are behind this great initiative, as mush as I was stirred by the music.

The main reason why I decided to make this the topic of my next post was because the show got me thinking how much more there is to life than just the 8 hour job we all are so attached to and the rest of the 16 hours of our day which we spend either complaining about things around us or are busy spending in front of the idiot box! I have always been one of the types who has been pained by a lot of things that happen around me, but most of the times, I realize I have only been complaining and criticizing than gettting out of my comfort zone and doing something. The music made me realize that there are so many simple ways of getting happiness and peace and the organisation, Gnyan Prabodh showed me how I can be a part of the change I want to see in this world!

I am sure many of my friends who are reading this, surely feel like contributing to such causes. I would like to impress however that we all should not stop with just contributing in kind to these great causes, but must give our might to such organisations to make our lives more purposeful. Please don't think I am preaching, but consider this as my humble thrust to get many of us (who are looking for ways to enrich our lives) moving out of our comfort zones.

I think I will let you all think more about this now and end by giving you Gnyan Prabodh's url for all of you who are raring to go. The url is www.gnyanprabodh.org. Happy contributing!